The healing power of Lady Time.

Saturday, August 10, 2013

(This was a post I created on my facebook page before I started this blog, at a time when I felt at my wits end, and got the ‘epiphany’ on what I would require for healing. I now share it on this blog, in the hope it would help someone...somewhere…somehow…)

Everything, it is said, has its season. The saying applies to both good and bad: good things have their season. Bad things also have their season.

When good things happen, as humans (and even if we were super-humans), we would want to prolong them for as long as possible, and milk every good memory we can of them. The reverse is the case when bad things happen: that loss of someone so dear, words cannot express the hollowness we feel; the disappointment from betrayal that squirms like a deep-seated knife in the heart whenever remembered; the disillusionment from crushed dreams and the seeming impending gloom of failure.

Alas, as all these negative waves and emotions cascade, we are sometimes too overwhelmed with their gravity that rather than deal with them, we just want them to disappear with the wave of a magic wand, and have every lasting memory extinguished. Unfortunately, just like the good things, the bad things had its season, and did happen. They cannot be conjured away, and must be dealt with.

Our greatest inquiry at this point is not whether we as humans can overcome the effects of the bad things, and resist allowing the effects to be long-lasting. While we may acknowledge that indeed, we will get over the bad things, our innate query lies in one word: WHEN?

And that is where Lady Time comes in.

She is one thing that eventually heals the hurting, rejuvenates the wounded, brings back to life the near-dead. Her powers are not acute and/or magical; she does not immediately conjure feel-good emotions, which dispel the feel-bad emotions. Rather, her powers are gradual, and kick-in to make things better with the passage of every second, minute, hour, day, week, month, quarter, year, century....

Lady Time thus takes her time in ensuring that someday, the tears are forgotten, the broken heart - while it may never be as pretty and 'unsmeared' as it once was - is completely healed. The heartache is gone. The self-esteem is returned.

She gently, but gradually, wraps each hurting being/situation and uses her powers to make the bad not so bad, until it becomes good. Gently, she soothes. Gently, she wipes. Gently, she caresses and soothes away all the drama, or non-drama. Till the bad memory is but a memory, or no memory at all. She seeps through the pores of the wounds and continuously clots them, till the blood has ceased flowing, and danger is forgotten.

Her name is Time, not 'Magic', nor 'Sudden'. Her job is a process; it must happen. It may take a while. But if allowed to do her job, Lady Time is a perfectionist.

Truly, Lady Time is a timeless gift given to mankind to ensure the taps of tears eventually cease flowing, and the beauty in living is once more appreciated. There is no doubt that if given the opportunity, Lady Time delivers on her job specifications.

The problem however may be insufficient willpower to allow her execute her duties. We believe that snap! The hurt must end. The pain should stop. The feel-bad emotions should just go away. And the sunshine, flowers, laughter and ice-cream should be oozing once more.

But she doesn't work that way; Lady Time IS a Lady, and is neither hurried nor harried. She expects to be treated as such, and thus is not rushed into finishing what she starts. 

Our greatest task on the road to recovery from bad things happening is allowing the process of time to pass, and the understanding that healing is a process. We must let patience also play its part in the healing process, for only then can Lady Time be assured that she would be given the required resources to fulfill her mission.

One thing that would enable this is to look beyond the helplessness, hopelessness and despair of the circumstances, and envision a future where all is well once more. In doing this, Lady Time begins work on the present, in order to attain that future.

Never give up hope that the sun, flowers, laughter and ice-cream would one day return. However, understand that it is a process which can only happen with time. Do not despair and think that perhaps, the present catatonic state of unhappiness will forever be your companion. Rather, remember that time will ensure that goodness and mercy continues to accompany you on the journey of life.

Do not worry too much about the distant future, as worrying will aggravate the present circumstances. Allow Lady Time do her work; and you do yours. Wake each day after the next, planting one foot after the other. Taking each day as it comes, and believing in the best for the next. Steadily, gradually, gently, the soothing and healing will creep in. The hurt begins to dissipate, the anger, the pain, the all evaporates. Life begins to seem better day after day.

Some days, it may seem everything has been sorted out and the sunshine is back. Other days, the cloud of despondency hovers palpably and appears to have returned to engulf you in its claws. Do not fear. Do not worry. Keep believing that the bad things will go away; keep living one day after the next; keep living and performing your daily tasks, while Lady Time goes about her own daily task of soothing and healing. 

One day, you will wake up, and realise, that everything seems alright. You may attempt to remember why you ever hurt, how you felt then, and when you stopped caring for the hurt. It is in that peaceful moment that you understand: Lady Time's work has been completed. 

Disclaimer: The pictures used do not belong to me, but are taken from Google.

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  1. My older bro just lost his fiancée, three weeks to their introduction. Her loss hit my family pretty hard. Time heals all wounds, but right now it just hurts like hell. I'll probably appreciate this post better in a week or so...

    1. Wow! Jyte, I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't honestly imagine what both families must be going through. I pray God gives y'all the strenght to go through it, and makes y'all stronger with time. xoxo...

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  3. 'Went thru hell in marriage n got thrown out of it, after all i did to make it work. At de time, it hurt like crazy! De abuse, my heart torn to shreds, time just seemed to stop n my life crashed all around me like a park of cards...thot i would never come out of de depression i went into, my self esteem at an all-time low. But guess wot?! Lady Time sure went to work on me, it's not been easy but i'm definitely seeing de light at de dark tunnel of despondency n despair n i know dat one day, when i turn back to look at whr i'm comin from, i'll have a lot to thank Lady Time for her great healin powers!

    1. Hi,

      That you're still standing is what makes you a victor. Wow, I can't even try to imagine the hurt and all you must have felt. But like you said, time did play its part in making sure you came out stadng tall. Thank you for sharing with everyone, and encouraging us all to perservere through whatever we may be facing at the moment. xoxo..